The Capy Life Manifesto

A softly absurd philosophy for anyone who needs a warm bath, a snack, and a break from the noise.

Life can feel… a lot.

Everyone is rushing and trying hard. They refresh the same three phone apps. They want to be amazing and well-rested at the same time.
It’s exhausting.

Meanwhile, somewhere in warm water, half-submerged and blinking slowly at the universe…
is a capybara who has chosen peace.

This manifesto is for those who feel quietly tired. It is for the humor-driven and snack-motivated. It is for the absurdly self-aware. It is for those who are trying their best, gently.

Welcome to Capy Life.

We choose calm.
We choose cozy.
We choose joy that does not have to be earned.

Now — I’ll take it from here.

— Gene

1. The Warm Water Principle

Everything is more solvable when you are warm.

Humans try to think themselves out of stress.
I recommend floating out of it.

Lower your shoulders.
Release your jaw.
Find the nearest metaphorical (or literal) warm bath.

You are not meant to live in a constant state of being slightly clenched.

Return to softness.


2. The Bro Philosophy

Sometimes the deepest wisdom is one single word.

There are moments where talking is too much.
Explanations are exhausting.
Life has already said enough.

So we look at someone we trust and say:

Bro.

No notes.
No elaboration.
Just shared existence.

Sometimes that is love.

Doodle: Two capybaras side-by-side, facing the same direction.

3. The Snack Doctrine

Never attempt emotional growth on an empty stomach.

You are not unraveling — you are just under-snacked.

Before spiraling, ask:

  • Have I hydrated?

  • Have I had a treat today?

  • Would this feel different if I were eating something warm and toasty?

Clarity improves with carbs.

4. The Sacred Art of Doing Nothing (On Purpose)

Your worth is not tied to your productivity.

Doing nothing is not failure.
Doing nothing is a reset.

Sit.
Stare at a wall.
Become a loaf of gentle existence.

When the moment calls you again, you’ll know.
Until then: float.


5. The Gentle Chaos Rule

Chaos is real — but panic is optional.

Sometimes life is loud and falling apart and wearing mismatched socks.
This is normal.

When chaos comes, respond like a capybara:

Blink. Slowly.
Let the moment arrive.
Let the moment pass.

Your calm is not ignorance —
your calm is self-preservation.

The Capy Life Pledge

We choose:

  • Warmth over urgency

  • Snacks over spirals

  • Humor over performance

  • Stillness over panic

  • Floating over flailing

We may be ridiculous.
But we are peaceful about it.

Doodle: Sparkles + tiny sleepy star.We are Capy Life.

 

I’ll be in the warm bath if you need me.
— Gene